You mad, bro?

People get mad about the wrong things. I’m one of those people but I try really hard not to be. I never used to dissect the reasons for being angry because it was just easier to assume that I was mad for a good reason. When you put it under a microscope things typically turn out much differently. I had to start pulling things apart to see what the real issue was. Am I really angry or did I get my feelings hurt and it’s easier to show anger than cry about it? Was I mad at the person or was I mad at the situation? Is it rational to even be upset? Is it something I can change or control because if it isn’t, then why bother being angry? These  sound like simple questions but sometimes the answers are hard but without asking yourself the above you’re going to continue to waste your energy on things that may be a waste of your time. 

The same goes if someone is mad at you (or acting like they’re mad at you). You have to ask yourself, “Are they really mad at me or the situation we’re in?” “What could I have done to make it better, if anything?” “Should I really be taking this personally/are they misdirecting their anger?” If you ask yourself these questions it may save a relationship and allow you to let go of unnecessary worry and concern.  

It’s been said many times before but it’s true that tone and meaning is lost in anything other than face to face conversation. You can’t see if I’m smiling, laughing, crying, and you can’t tell if I’m being derogatory, sarcastic, or light hearted right now. You have no idea if I'm listening to Alice in Chains or listening to Johnny Mathis singing "Winter Wonderland." In actuality, you’re going to read this in the tone that you choose. So, if you’re feeling particularly defensive today, you may read this and feel like I’m telling you that you’ve sabotaged all of your relationships (or think this blog is about you - it's not). Ha! :) If you’re feeling lighthearted and reading this simply to pass the time, then you may feel like this is me just rambling, which is quite possible.

Stay warm, friends! It’s chilly (but beautiful) in Seattle today.